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January 25, 2008


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Jolly Roger

I'm happy to see that I've made an impression,
and livened up your blogging session.
Sometimes it's good to strike a chord.
It helps stop the punters getting bored.

Unfortunately, I have this odd affliction,
Which compels me to rhythmically rhyme my diction.
I even get trouble when shopping at Tesco's,
What with their wordy and non-rhyming frescos.

When I'm asked if I need some help to pack.
I cannot help but answer them back:
Thank you for your generous offer,
It's really nice of you to proffer.
But I can manage all the same, And wouldn't wish you to feel any blame.

With regard to the Laureate Poet.
I could do it, and don't I know it?
Unfortunately, I would be excluded.
By the Welsh language crowd, who would not be deluded
By my lack of Welsh, Oh woe is me.
I'll stick to the day job for the times that be.


Thank you Jolly Roger. I read your first Ode at the Dinner table today and it was thoroughly appreciated. Although I don't think the Poet Laureate's job is likely to be yours, you have greatly enlivened this blog

Jolly-ish Roger

Thanks for your tentative words of praise.
I don't get many of those these days.
Verse, being good enough for Billy Shake.
Certainly keeps the punters awake.
There again, am I really Roger?
Or could it be that I'm just pulling your todger?

With regard to Peter and Paul.
Present company excepted, I don't have the gall.
Their similarities, like pods of peas.
Working for a government mired in sleaze.
Assures me not of any changes.
They're simply riders of the ranges.
Cowboys by a better name.
In politics for cash and fame.

I could continue, at risk of boring.
Methinks I hear a stifled snoring.
So now it's time to end my prose.
No Paul, I don't think YOU'RE one of those.


Thanks Valleysmam. That's is a fascinating and wholly plausible insight.


I worked with Paul Murphy in Ebbw Vale College.
His desk was the same there, plus a whole load of gentlemen’s toiletries some one view some not.
However us women were only allowed to visit not reside, women in business studies, as the department was then, were assigned their own staff room, and banned by a cabal from residency in the upper room. They had the fridge too, but we were forbidden a place for our milk there in. The more enlightened came to reside down stairs. Its little wonder there was an equal opps. enquiry at the College.


Thanks -not so jolly -Roger. the first verse for this blog. Well done on your knowledge of Odo Hain the Shapeshifter.

Robbing Peter to reward Paul is not progress. They are both better human beings than the 'snouters' that you describe. they both made a difference in Northern Ireland

Jolly Roger

So Peter's gone I hear you say.
Time to shout Hip Hip Hooray.
He'll be seeking pastures new,
On the Gravy train, EU.
He'll be back, have no doubt.
'Cos where there's a trough,
There's Peter's snout.

He's shifted shape, time and again,
That's the way with Peter Hain.
He sleeps as liquid in a bucket.
This time he awoke and just said...

I don't think I'll go in today.

Paul Murphy's back, he's reinstated.
What have we done to be so fated?
Another snouter, of that I'm sure.
It's just that he's an interminable bore.


I probably was kinder than I should have been. But I have known him for 40 years and he has some fine qualities.

Having him burdened with office means that half the anti-coalition duo is neytralised. Cheer up. It could have been Don Touhig or Kim Howells. That would not have pleased you.

Come back Peter.


Did you write this to wind me up? You started well but then moved "on message". I can't think of any vote he has cast that would meet with the approval of the majority of his constituents.
I can't think of anything useful he has ever achieved for Wales or his constituency. I was ecstatic when he became SoS for NI since it would obviously keep him out of Wales more and (at the time) I hoped the paramilitaries would have caused a byelection.

Unfortunately he demonstrates that a monkey with a red rosette would get elected here (and I'm not commenting on the obvious physical similarities).

Fortunately I was lucky enough to be able to vote for one of the greatest backbenchers ever (actually on my 18th birthday) but there is no way I would ever support this anti-Welsh, god bothering fifth rate party hack of a blairite yes man. Frankly if I thought anyone (other than a tory) had a good chance of unseating that grinning buffoon, I would vote for them.

It is people like Murphy who give political parties a bad reputation (I want to vote for a person I can support), and who turn people off voting.

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